Its like my energy is seeping out of me, only leaving the debris I don’t want. Please talk to me. Help me change it around. Lets uplift the spirit, honouring all there is, but choosing something so bright it will light up the entire sky. Talk to me:
‘Run’ she said, ‘run like the devil. With the wind in your hair. Black, long , curly and days from a wash. It smells of the sea, the sweat and the wildness that runs in your veins. Run, run, run, faster than the wild, longer than the sea. You will not see nothing here anyway. The mountains are here, and obscure your sight. There is nothing left for you here, but bones and rotting debris. Run run run’, she yells almost as a whisper – and I run. Faster and longer than I have ever run. ‘You are the wind, the sea and all the things that decay and turn into new life. Don’t you see?’ Her voice loud, clear and almost furious now. ‘You are it all. Your strength does not lie in beauty, softness, calmness or even in your words. Your strength lies in your eyes, if they dare to see. To see that which really is. Look at the ocean and all you see is a blue, green, grey, black and sometimes white surface. All the colours of the sky are reflecting in the surface of the sea. But that is not the sea. The sea…the sea is the softness against your skin, the coolness surrounding you on a hot summer day. It is the place of delicious food and dangerous life that will end yours in a heartbeat. The sea devourers all there is, while giving life to much there is. You are the sea. You are a drop and you are the ocean. You reflect, contain, devourer and create….so it is. Do you see? You are all….don’t let your focus be on one thing. Don’t get lost in the feelings of this and that. Don’t seek the truth or the answers, cuz there are none, and while you search, life seeps out of you. Find enjoyment….find it way beyond making sense, doing good, give fulfilment and sacrifice…don’t ever sacrifice. Sacrifice holds nothing, choice holds the world. Do let go now dear….’her voice has turned soft, her brittle hair is waving softly around her face…even the light is so soft now….I whisper: ‘will you lay your hand on my chest? Will you feel my heart?” No’, she says,’ you don’t need it. You don’t even need to feel your heart yourself…OH cant you see??!! You don’t need to feel, to think or to say it….you are it and no matter what you do, nothing will change it. You are always it.